icarusalsoflew | 003. and in every raindrop... // open post.

[ This one's quietly drinking his tea in his office, reading through the news on one of the fresh newspapers laid out on his desk. The recent attempt on Catherine Stone's life has him frowning, but other than that, he's fine. It's Vigil business, something he would like to feel more mobile on, but Riley's aware that he can only do so much, given his current condition.

He's not tired round the clock like when he first woke up, but he's not like other particularly stubborn Malice Kings who push the envelope where it concerns the words "house arrest".

Still, it is so damned tedious to be stuck, and to know that only time and rest can see to it. ]

[And where Hikaru really meant to head straight for his room and curl up and maybe pretend he wasn't alive for a few hours, he finds himself wandering close to the office Liandrin shares with Riley and Aidan. He can also hear Riley inside.

Something in him aches. Maybe it has to do with what he's just figured out for himself a few minutes ago. Maybe it has to do with that odd sense of deja vu that's coming over him, given the last time it wash him here, and that man over there. Maybe it's both.

He really, really hasn't been at his best lately. This had to stop.

For the moment, though, he's going to see what he can do to not make any of this seem too strange. Riley's probably noticed him by now: might as well preempt the other man. (Yes, he did promise to be better. It doesn't have to be now, though, does it?)

Knocking now, and valiantly resisting the urge to just... lean on the thing. People are passing through the area. It's morning.]

Riley. Are you going down to join the others soon?

[...And really, Hikaru Shinta, get your shit together. He's definitely going to hear the way you sound (read: like you are not good in the slightest).]

[ Yes, he heard. And yes, he wasn't going to press -- but since you have decided to break the silence, my boy... ]

I think I'll stay in today, I'm not feeling up to snuff. [ Read: NOT A LIE, especially when this one's awake when he's supposed to be asleep. ]

Come join me?

[ It's an offer the Blade King can admittedly turn down... it'll just mean Riley will be all by his lonesome for the next couple of hours. ]

[There is silence on the other end of the door for precisely fifteen seconds, and then a sigh.]

Yeah, I think I will. Not feeling too hot myself.

[But the door isn't opening. Moments like these, one is one's own worst enemy.]

[ Riley manages to push himself up the moment he hears that sigh. He is also laying a hand on the knob just as Hikaru finishes that sentence and opening the door about two seconds later. ]

Go on. [ The Daywalker smiles pleasantly as he gestures gently into the room. ] No one here but me.

[Hikaru, on the other hand, stares at him for a moment, and he looks about as lost as he did that other time he ended up in your office and had to eventually apologize for bleeding all over it.

It's disappearing, though, as the younger Malice King attempts, once again, to shore up whatever left of him into himself in a last ditch attempt to remain functional for just a bit longer. Hopefully long enough to get through the door, and away from prying eyes and ears - something he's attempting to do right now.]

I need a drink.

[Yes. Yes, he does.]

[ What's that word you enjoy using so much that everyone gets into the habit of using it eventually? Oh yes -- interesting.

A gentle pat on your shoulder, ] Go sit, Hikaru.

[ He's leaving you to close the door -- you can do that, can't you? -- and making his way over to the liquor cabinet to pick out something for you both. ]

[No words from this one at that, just him shutting the door and locking it, and then making a beeline for that couch and slumping down.

Does he look tired? If so, that's because he is. He doesn't have the mental or emotional strength to deal with any of this, and the shock is starting to settle in.

No lighter for him when he goes for a cigarette; he'll settle for flame from his fingertips. He probably won't be able to get a lighter to work right now, and he knows it.]

[ And what Riley is setting down right in front of you is a bottle of Bourbon, aged well and not yet opened.

The last time you were both here, he was still trying to isolate a new emerging pattern. He's had ample time to observe you since, and to figure out what it might be.

The variables have been consistent, after all. ]

[Reaching over to crack that open --

-- hum. Bourbon. How... apt.

And now he really wishes that he didn't make the connection. You're going to see his expression break a little now, Mr. Falner, right before he's trying yet again (and failing, yet again) to steal himself and focusing on opening the damned bottle.]

On my honor, I swear that whatever we speak of will remain in this room.

[ That's said as he reclines in the chair he's pulled to sit across from you. His gaze is shuttered, but the concern is in the tone that laces the words. ]

I know.

[He trusts you like that. Always has, really, even when he wasn't at his best this year, since your awakening. And he's a little worse for wear now.

Pouring himself a drink, then, and taking a long draught of it before he ever manages to find the words.]

Figured something out today. It kind of... it kind of threw me.

[ He's just going to lean over and pour himself a glass then. You just downed one in one go, after all. His Mother Daywalker senses are tingling. ]

Would you like a cigar?

[ Because it looks like you'll be keeping him company for quite a bit. ]

Yeah... yeah, that would be good.

[His voice broke a little there. Goddamnit.

More Bourbon is definitely in order. Now here's hoping that his hands would stop shaking.]

[ He's rising at that to retrieve his cigar case, out of which he pulls two sticks -- one for you, one for him -- and cutting them both before he settles down on the couch right beside you.

When he presses the stick into your palm, he curls his fingers around yours. ]

Tell me.

[ You will always have his ear. And he will always keep any secrets you wish him to. ]

[Give him a bit. Just two puffs.

There: now he's turning to look up at you with that helpless, painful sort of smile that he only ever gets when his heart's starting to break.]

I'm in love with Joshua LaRue.

[And that is potentially a horrible, horrible thing.]

[ Ah.

Well.

Should he...? Bloody hell, might as well. ]

I was... afraid that might be it.

[ How apt that you're having this conversation on the couch that you had bled into just a few weeks before.

You'll probably see the look on this one's face. Sorry, Hikaru. Might have seen the possibility of that coming. To be fair he had quietly hoped that he was wrong? ]

[Even in his state, he's taking note of that look. Or maybe it's BECAUSE he's in this state that he's hyper aware, and therefore manages to notice it.]

What do you mean by that?

[Please don't tell him that you figured it out before he did --

-- of course you did. What the hell is wrong with him? How could he have been so slow?

Still. The question's out for you to answer as you will. Maybe he doesn't have to hit himself over the head too much after all. ~~Yeah, right.~~]

Edited 2014-05-12 05:37 (UTC)

[ Have a sympathetic look your way, Hikaru. ]

I never meant to pry. But after things went south with Aria, I was worried for you. [ Because that was another door closed in your face. Because he knows that when you love, it is a terrible and beautiful gift. Because you are a little brother to him and sometimes you don't even realize that you are falling until you are flat on the floor. ]

And then we spoke, on this very couch.

[ A sigh. ] And then I heard word that you went to San Diego. [ Have a Look, Blade King. ] With that one. Shortly after his... I gather it was his twenty-eighth birthday?

[Now he's just going to set his glass and his cigar down and sink his head very quietly into his hands for a moment.

Speaking a bit after. It's still muffled by his palms.]

That obvious, huh.

[Obvious to everyone but him, at least until he had made the connection just this morning.

Shit.]

[ Oh, Hikaru...

Have an arm around your shoulders then. He understands how difficult this must -- and will likely, be. The boy is not like the others. ]

Only because I know your patterns well. [ Saying that gently. ] I have known you for more than a handful of millenia.

[Give him a bit to try to figure out how to breathe around all of the tightness in his chest and throat, old friend.

He doesn't quite get to the level of "not okay" that he can manage, but it'll have to do. Pulling back, and going for that cigar again. Then the drink. Then back to the cigar.]

He has no idea.

[ ... ]

Well, that is... problematic.

[ Very.

Okay, he's pouring you both another round. ]

[He is definitely going to get you a bottle to replace that one at another time, because at the rate that he is falling apart right now? He's going to go through that thing very quickly in your company.]

I don't know what to do. I don't think I can change the way I feel, but...

[But the last time he tried, he ended up losing in a big way. Furthermore, risking that with someone who definitely won't be around for very long and also definitely deserves better than him just doesn't seem like a smart idea --

-- screw smart. Maybe at the end of it all, he isn't sure whether he could handle another loss, another possible rejection. Maybe if he had to try again and fail again, it really would end up ruining him.]

[ And if you actually let him know that you will replace the bottle just because you think you ought to, he might just give you a piece of his mind.

The Kings keep booze around for a reason -- and that reason is that it is to be drunk when the occasion requires it. ]

Must you change the way you feel?

[ Yes, it must be asked. ]

003. and in every raindrop... // open post.

Waking the Dead 2.0 : 3 July 2063

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